Fearless

Yesterday was long, Chloe screamed at the Library, a little less at Target, and practically the whole time at Chick Fil A. I guess 18 months is not a great age to run errands with. Landon has been talking in a baby voice that he thinks is just adorable, I however think it's awful. Then I realized he was probably doing it because his ultra loud baby sister is getting a lot of attention lately, and the baby talk might help him in getting some extra attention. It's over 100 degrees daily, and our public pool closes this week, wahhh!! So basically I've been a tad on edge this week, and woke up a teeny bit grumpy this morning.
After we got done run a few errands before Logan went to work we came home for lunch. I shamelessly turned on my "Party in the USA" pandora station and the first song that came on was Fearless by Taylor Swift. This album came out just before Logan and I got married and obviously I loved it. When we moved in to our first apartment, which really shouldn't have been called an apartment because you couldn't even fit a couch, I listened to this song all the time. I sang it loudly for Logan while I made dinner, or we danced like goofy lovebirds in our fun-sized kitchen. When I heard that song today my mind was flooded with memories of our newlywed days when I was a little 19 year old, with no babies, hardly even a thought of having a baby, and our biggest worry was..well honestly I can't think of many worries we had in those days. I'm sure they were there, but they had to have been pretty insignificant.
 So here I am almost 6 years and 2 kids later in my living room looking at my sweet family all dancing around together to that same song. I felt happy. But not just happy, joyful. Chloe looking up at me with her big blue eyes and the roundest little face, and Landon jumping around with a sticky face from his slushy at QT. Meanwhile Logan was working on installing some new hardware for our kitchen. It was one of those moments when I thought to myself "this is a moment I'll remember forever, everything is exactly how it should be." For today, everything IS how it should be. I know that circumstances can change in the blink of an eye, and that's part of life, so in those moments of gratitude because everything is how it should be I am really trying to cherish it. The other night my Chloe girl woke up at 2:00 am and I really wanted to remember all of it. I want to remember her sweet smell, the sound of her vigorously sucking on her purple paci, and the way it felt when her chubby little fingers softly scratched my arm while I held her. That morning I wanted to remember the sound of Landon's voice when he woke me up asking for ovaltine and to help him turn on a show. 

My kids are little, full of energy, and innocence. The days are long a lot of the times, my patience often runs thin, and every night I tell myself I'm going to try to do better tomorrow. The thing is though, when I really look at my life and see how incredibly blessed we've been I have to stop at think ''cause I don't know how it gets better than this.."